Failtars
I have 3 guitars and a bass at home. All very modest, A Squier Strat, A Squier Precision, a no name Chinese junker (it still has the Value Village price tag $49.99 in Canadian Pesos), and an Art & Lutherie Parlour Acoustic. I’m pretty happy with all of them. I do sometimes get guitar buying urges. For example I think that this Fifth Avenue Kingpin by Godin is probably very nice. Canadian wood, beautifully made, in black please, for Christmas.
There are much more puzzling guitars out there on the market. Almost a puzzling as Guitar Hero. Almost as puzzling as Rock Band.
Fender Joe Strummer Signature Telecaster Electric Guitar
Pre-distressing turns it into a guitar into a FAILTAR. It just does. If you wondering if it really is commodified here’s the answer:
It comes with a Sheperd Fairy graphics kit.
The Reverse Flying V
Should you do something just because you can? I think the answer to that question is right here in FAILTAR form.
WHY WHY WHY?
The only people who would buy this guitar are Canadian. Frank Soda, and Kim Mitchell. Oh wait! Maybe Rick Nielsen would. He’s from Chicago. That’s almost Canada. Maybe there’s some kind of wacky and undignified guitarist gene that mutates people when they listen to Frank Zappa.
I’d like to add that using FAIL in the way that I have sucks. Failure all round. For everyone.
BYE!
CANADA are discussing. 
CANADA 10:21 pm on December 4, 2008 Permalink |
Dear Mr Cavill,
While the Reverse Flying V is an intriguing idea, we are currently embroiled in a constitutional crisis and we feel that the direction of the V must not enter the debate. As Mr Mitchell and Mr Soda are national treasures, largely for their contributions to the Rock Canon, they are also our leading constitutional experts, and their expertise, in this area, is very much need in this most dire time.
Respectfully yours,
CANADA
Adam Cavill 9:51 am on December 5, 2008 Permalink |
Dear Canada,
I am very sorry if I have distracted Mr. Soda or Mr. Mitchell from their duties with a crazy guitar. My only defense is that I did not invent them, they are real products that you can buy and therefore the damage has already been done.
Mr. Cavill USA!