I was cycling home yesterday through industrial Jersey City. I got to the part where the big scrap metal yard is and saw a bunch of guys hanging around after work smoking and drinking beer. I was pretty jealous of them. One of their buddies was across the street on his way back from the Liquor Store with more beer.
He said “Your bike is awesome but check out me out!!!!!! I’m dope!!!!.”
He was riding
a
little
tiny
clown
bicycle
It couldn’t have been more than 16 inches tall.
I almost crashed from laughing.
I made her from banner ad!
SO PRETTIE. ALSO WTF?
The movie Awakenings, starring Robert De Niro and Robin Williams was on TV last night. I said, “Robin Williams is a nice man.”
Tigerlili said, “Yes he is. I would invite him over to my house.”
Pause
“I do not like Mötley Crüe. They are horrible.”
I said, “Do not worry. They will not come over.”
What? DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING hatchan-nikki????
YOU THINK YOU FUNNY? I WILL SHOW YOU WHO IS NUMBER ONE ION INTARNET!
are you a smart alex>>??
don’t make me have to BITE YOUO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
this is not the end!
Haven’t had one in a while so I haven’t done one of these. Today’s marketing call had me thinking about sockmonkeys.
If I do have one I’m going to go crazy spending my money on stuff from Battleheat. The picture above is a real life tier 2 set of Paladin armor from WoW. That probably means nothing to you and it probably shouldn’t. I also probably want this…
Why bother with prostitutes, sports cars and gambling when you can get armor and weapons?
UPDATE:
I just talked to my angry wife.
Apparently I have to get Imperial Stormtrooper armor but no helmet allowed. she clearly does not understand the nature of mid life crisis es. they are about ARMOR and METAL and WEAPONS. They are not about Harrison Ford Cosplay.
I just got back from the shared public restroom of the office in which I work. What an interesting visit! Let me tell you it’s not because I’m obsessed with bodily functions. I don’t keep a notebook with entries for number 0nes and number Twos. It was because a terrible misunderstanding almost occurred between myself and another “gentleman”. A terrible misunderstanding that wouldn’t have almost occurred if he had followed one of my simple rules for restroom etiquette.
Here is what happened:
Continue reading ‘Etiquette for Restrooms’
I got an email today.
Dear Adam,
I didn’t really get understand what was going on in the post about the word tardy.
signed,
A Concerned Reader
Don’t worry, I didn’t understand what was going on either.
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